I may have jinxed last week’s post when I mentioned Jarunda or it’s just those things the universe plans out.
Today’s intro is very brief. If you haven’t read last post where we talked about sex and abstinence after featuring Worth The Wait KE, click here This post won’t make sense if you haven’t had a look.
Being a response post as heavily voted for on my Instagram, I will not give my position as I may or may not agree with the post but I believe in people being able to air their opinion.
Without further ado here’s Jarunda once more…
So, let’s do this topic again, only this time, your tutor is Dr. Jarunda himself.
For this class, you must at least have read the previous post about abstinence. I love how she introduces the article, that sex is something we are no longer shy from talking about. Well, we no longer shy away from having sex as well, truth be told. The article goes on to explain how social media puts everything at our disposal and makes this a norm and I agree.
Then we get to this point, I felt like laughing but at the same gave it quite some thought. A very pretty girl *wink*, runs an abstinence movement… oookay… but she was motivated by a sexual experience gone wrong!!!!!! I honestly burst out laughing, no offense but seriously, lets dig into this.
I know the point of abstaining has a lot of religious vibe around it and health of course like our friend here, and this being the core of why we are told to abstain. With the medical fields working round the clock to ensure our sexual lives are infection free, are safe and enjoyable you’d really have a difficult time hitting us with the STI and STD vibe. With condoms available and soon enough Samanthas, not to mention every sort of drug, you honestly look the fool to make a huge decision to have pre-marital sex, and have it unprotected. That’s why I have lots of questions revolving around this movement, “what if she didn’t get this infection?” And that why I feel that an STI is not motivation enough to stop a flash flood of young generation engaging in sex.
Then what is, Dr. Jarunda? Please tell us.
Now hear this. Human beings are sexual beings and that means we are expected to have sex at some point in life. You’ll quickly say “after marriage”, and I’m here thinking it’s an essence of time and with whom you’re having it with. Religion will call it fornication if it comes before marriage ‘time’, and call it adultery if you’re having it with the wrong partner after marriage ‘with whom’. So in real sense, what makes sex a good thing or a bad thing, is timing and with whom you’re doing it?
But who kept their clock ticking till they tasted alcohol that was clearly indicated 18 years and above, or entered a club meant for 25 years and above? Or kept their clocks ticking till they glanced at soap operas that our parents told us were “for elderly people only”? Class, you can add more examples, but point is, why wait for something you’ll eventually do in the same fashion, maybe or maybe not with the same person, but the biggest difference being the name it will be tagged?
“Waiting to have sex in marriage increases your chances of success in marriage” our pretty friend says. Wait, if I don’t want to get married, I am not allowed to have sex? But why won’t my sexual organs vanish the moment I decide I won’t get married?
Wesonga, the most attentive student answers – free will!
Dr. Jarunda rephrases it as freedom of choice.
There’s a higher calling to abstinence than just a sex gone wrong, because abstinence is only abstinence at the point of no sex at all. Yet to every single act that the world, religion or the court of public opinion defines as good or bad, the only thing that stands in between is the freedom to do it or not. So you want to abstain class, work on your freedom of not having sex. Stands a better chance of working than joining a movement in my vast years of experience. If not, then have sex because nothing can stop you from it. Absolutely nothing.
At this point, I probably sound like a sex enthusiast, well at some point I was, in the bandwagon for abstinence, but I will never tell anyone to have sex simply because my experience wasn’t bad enough to make think, “I should have abstained”. In today’s society, sex is a very casual thing, no longer a forbidden fruit that tastes sweetest, probably a particular fruit at most grocery shelves. We know about it, joke or rather Lamba Lolo about it and the weight it possesses gets very light for a 16 year old, onward even less weighty.
This waters down the high esteem it held back in the days and it saddens me, yet at this point, whether you have sex or not, do it because you choose to.